Carol-Ann’s Birth Story
March 30th, 2009 by admin - Tagged with - Posted in Birth Stories
At my first meeting with the NHS midwife at my local surgery, it soon became clear to me that one to one care was not available and I was just another number on the list of a very busy midwife. So busy, there was no time to check my baby?s heartbeat. I left that meeting feeling very low and with all my questions unanswered. I decided immediately that this was not how I wished to feel throughout my pregnancy and so I began looking into the options available to me for my ante-natal, birth and post-natal care.
I realised that the best option was for me to have one to one care from a midwife whom I could get to know and whom I knew would be there to support both me and my husband during the birth and afterwards. Having visited my local maternity ward, I also realised that a hospital birth was something I wished to avoid if at all possible. In particular, I disliked the strict hospital policies regarding interventions ? eg dilate at 1cm per hour or they would intervene, and the fact that my husband would not be allowed to stay with me when I was moved to the post-natal ward between 8pm and 10am ? even if the baby was born during these hours! My husband was also unsure if he wished to be present during the actual birth and so we were keen that I felt comfortable with whoever was looking after me. Some discussions and refinancing later, my husband and I decided that we would hire an independent midwife and opt for a home birth. We found Jenny.
We first met Jenny when I was about 16 weeks pregnant. We spent about 1.5 hours together at that first meeting and I felt that a great weight had been lifted from my shoulders. Suddenly, I felt that everything would be fine and someone was there to look after me throughout (and answer all my silly questions). Having engaged Jenny so early on in my pregnancy, both my husband and I had lots of time to get to know her and feel really comfortable with her and confident in her ability to see us through the unknown process of birth and caring for a newborn.
In the two weeks prior to the birth of my baby, I think I must have spoken to Jenny at least once a day as I seemed to experience every pre-labour sign in the book! Jenny also proved a great source of strength and comfort to me when I was dealing with hospital doctors and midwives who, following the 22 week and 32 week scans wanted to induce me early due to my baby being ?large? ? exactly the type of needless intervention I had wished to avoid!.
Finally, Saturday night, a couple of days before my due date, my waters broke and contractions began and so began a long, sleepless night for me. Jenny visited me at home early on the Sunday morning but the contractions stopped so we agreed to keep in touch through the day and see what happened. I walked about 5k that day and finished it off with a curry! It worked. Contractions started again late on Sunday night and we called Jenny. On her recommendations, we had taken a hypnobirthing course and I found it worked wonders through the labour itself. During the first half of the birth, I felt so calm and everything was so quiet and peaceful. It was truly lovely being at home and Jenny got the perfect balance between letting us get on with the birth and making suggestions to help me along.
Although fully dilated after about 12 hours of regular contractions, I pushed at home for about 3 hours but to no avail. I personally believe the baby decided to have a nap! And I can?t say I blame her as having had no sleep since I got up on Saturday morning, I was feeling pretty tired too! At this point, although both baby and I were doing fine, I asked Jenny to call the hospital and to take me in as I was feeling too exhausted to continue without assistance. Although not what I had wanted in my ?birth plan?, I knew, in my heart, that I just did not have the energy to go on. Unfortunately, not even Jenny could turn off the contractions for half an hour to let me eat and sleep and gather my reserves for the final furlong!
Jenny came with me in the ambulance and acted as my advocate once we got to the hospital. I felt I didn?t need to worry about what was going to happen as Jenny would make sure I was looked after in the way I wanted. The staff at the hospital were wonderful and, given how overworked they were, clearly glad to have Jenny on hand to help them out! My baby was delivered with the help of a ventouse shortly after arriving at the hospital. Jenny stayed with us right through the birth and for a short while afterwards. Unfortunately, I was moved to the post-natal ward at about 7pm and as no visitors were allowed after 8pm, I was on my own til 10am!
We left hospital the next day and then the real work began! The Jenny hotline remained open and she fielded calls daily from the early morning to late evening as we stumbled our way through the first few weeks of caring for our baby. It was Jenny who held my hand as I struggled with a week of the baby blues and with breastfeeding and who made sure I was taking care of myself as well! Those first few weeks disappeared in the blink of an eye and suddenly, sadly, it was discharge time -tho? not forever, as Jenny is already pre-booked for baby number 2 (should we be blessed with one!). We will once again be having a home birth ? and even if I do have to or choose to go to hospital again, I know I don?t need to worry about it.
Having engaged Jenny, we avoided rushed appointments, unanswered questions, anxiety about the birth, being treated by lots of different people none of whom knew us and unnecessary interventions. We made our journey confident and secure in the knowledge that we would be taken care of each step of the way by someone we knew, trusted and with whom we had established a warm friendship.
